Even tree limbs are looking like my brain. (CC image by Chapendra)

Thoughts on Thoughts

April 6, 2010 | 25 Comments

Category: Auto-Biography

It is April 5th today. This evening Marcia and I see the neurosurgeon to discuss the operation. Normally I write a piece, it goes to editor Roger for review, and then I post it around 90 days after the piece was written. The last three days I posted without Roger’s editing, within three days of a piece being composed. I write, and then a day or two later it posts.

With it likely I will have the aneurysm operation soon, and with my writing about events leading to the operation without the 90 day delay, the time scales of my writing and then posting have gone awry. Life of late has become so peculiar that a time shift almost fits right in.

The book came out on April 1st. I emailed friends yesterday, on Easter. Many came by the site and many have sent me touching comments. The juxtaposition of the book release and the aneurysm reemergence has created an environment difficult to describe. I wake most mornings with an upset stomach. Fear feels familiar.

I’m still muddling through the neurologist evaluation of my asymmetrical temporal lobe brain structure that explains the occasional passing outs, and now the spontaneous emergence of unconscious content into a normal waking day. If, indeed, the content of my evolutionary theory is a partial result of a unique brain structure that encourages the emergence of hallucinatory content in the everyday, and the unique content emerging from my unconscious is not particularly hallucinatory but actually represents reasonable structural evaluations of how humans evolved (particularly brain structures), then I am in the midst of a deeply peculiar experience.

It’s just hard to say whether the story here makes my theory particularly remarkable because my theory’s origin is connected to anomalous brain structure or whether the story is that this has just been a truly strange life, unrelated to the usefulness of the theory because the theory actually isn’t useful. And then there is the aneurysm. The neurologist says the aneurysm is unrelated to my unique asymmetrical brain, but may be exaggerating experiences that my brain structure encourages. Will the operation diminish my frequent conversations with my unconscious? Or, because the intervention itself will exaggerate the asymmetries as doctors cut tissues on the side where the aneurysm sits, will I emerge from the operation with increased communications from my unconscious. And, if so, will those communications continue to be the kind that feel intimate and satisfying or the kind that brought me to the neurologist that involved either passing out or having dreamlike states superimposed upon waking actions?

The aneurysm operation feels terrifying. With these issues regarding my anomalous brain structure, and my having developed a theory of evolution revolving around an exploration of brain structure, the aneurysm operation feels like its happening in an almost cinematically mysterious context. This feels particularly so with the book having come out on the same day as I was told the aneurysm likely required immediate medical intervention. My brain is about to be operated on. It’s not clear who exactly I will be when I awake.


This entry was posted on Tuesday, April 6th, 2010 at 6:56 am and is filed under Auto-Biography. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.
25 Comments so far

  1. Jordan on April 8, 2010 1:56 am

    Wishing you the best Andrew.
    love Jordan

  2. crinkle on May 13, 2010 11:45 am

    same here…keep us posted on your progress. Its a common condition in the ashkenzai jews i am related to who even had the occasional drink past the age of 50.

    These are not life threatening if not near the centre of the brain, (even then a Gamma knife can often fix that) but do require a major readjustment in terms of lifestyle.

  3. Christine on August 1, 2011 12:40 pm

    Chouette ciné à l’air libre à deux pas du centre de Lausanne projetant tous les étés des films de tous horizons


  4. Curtis on February 15, 2016 6:02 pm

    Are there any plans to revive Neoteny.org

  5. Curtis on August 18, 2017 12:29 pm

    I believe that Jon Niednagel, of Braintypes.com, has discovered the functions associated with testosterone and estrogen. Niednagel is a talent scout working with Boston Celtics, who has developed a personality theory by studying people’s motor movements and mannerisms.

    High Testosterone correlates with Niednagel’s “Empirical” function.

    Low Testosterone correlates with Niednagels’s “Conceptual” function.

    High Estrogen correlates with the “Animate” function.

    Low Estrogen correlates with the “Inanimate” function.

  6. Businesskfe on December 14, 2020 10:10 am

    Testaru. Best known

  7. Scannerouc on December 14, 2020 10:53 pm

    manuscripts held onto

  8. Interfaceezf on January 7, 2021 1:20 am

    manuscripts attributed to Robins

  9. Wirelessiqt on January 24, 2021 10:16 am

    monuments related to deep

  10. EOTechryq on January 26, 2021 7:50 pm

    book about the chess of love “, created by

  11. Arnottfze on February 19, 2021 2:19 pm

    A handwritten book is a book

  12. Broncoird on February 27, 2021 5:47 pm

    manuscripts attributed to Robins

  13. Nespressoqeg on February 28, 2021 12:13 pm

    text carrier and protective

  14. Minelabqxn on March 16, 2021 9:50 pm

    handwritten books were made,

  15. CHIRPasv on April 11, 2021 1:54 pm

    Europe, and in Ancient Russia

  16. Candyawf on April 21, 2021 3:40 am

    handwritten books were made,

  17. Bluetoothuqs on August 4, 2021 11:03 am

    consists of the book itself

  18. EOTechrpc on August 8, 2021 4:14 am

    European glory, and even after

  19. Drywallwxe on August 15, 2021 9:35 pm

    among them acquired “Moral

  20. Testertav on August 17, 2021 8:52 am

    Western Europe also formed

  21. Blenderjjm on August 21, 2021 12:54 pm

    (palimpsests). In the XIII-XV centuries in

  22. Irrigationyan on August 26, 2021 6:38 am

    from lat. manus – “hand” and scribo – “I write”) ]

  23. Flashpaqkyi on September 12, 2021 6:03 pm

    consists of the book itself

  24. Ray McMahan on December 21, 2021 12:56 am

    Whoever is keeping this site up now, thank you. This man’s thoughts are really intriguing. I tried Googling what happened to Andrew, but all online signs of activity ended around April 2010. I am guessing his brain aneurysm surgery didn’t go as well as hoped. I’m sorry for his wife and friends and family. I appreciate that his site has been kept up because he really had some interesting hypotheses.

  25. Fenderobw on June 13, 2022 1:54 pm

    Century to a kind of destruction:

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